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If the NFL were the “Rap Game”

    Chris Johnson would be Lil Wayne – Not only because they look similar, but because they perform similarly. In the past, Lil Wayne has sounded great, and Johnson has played great. Recently Lil Wayne sounds terrible and Johnson has played terribly. “CJ2K”  is playing like his salary should be about 2K per year, not 13.4 MILLION DOLLARS. Weezy has claimed to be the best rapper alive on multiple occasions.  Johnson has even been quoted saying, “I would have to say, I’m closest in comparison to Lil Wayne (in football) because I feel like I’m the best in the game and he’s the best in the rap game right now.” Needless to say, neither of these people are the best in their respective “games” right now.

   Albert Haynesworth would be Ice Cube – This is a little bold, because Cube has a respectable career, and one would argue that Haynesworth has not. The fact is that at one point, these two men were considered the baddest dudes in their craft, now…not so much. Ice Cube has gone from “F*** the Police” to Are We There Yet? Haynesworth was the most feared D-Lineman in his Tennessee days, now he is the laughing stock of the NFL. Fact is, these men are not who they used to be.

    Ray Lewis would be Eminem – Controversial, dominant, explosive, and mentally stable? Em and Ray have very similar styles, they play/perform with a controlled chaos. They are the best at what they do, and they’ve been doing it for a long time. Neither of them seem to be losing a step as they age either. We’ve seen Ray and Eminem “lose themselves” on multiple occasions throughout the years, but they always seem to come back even stronger.

    Darrelle Revis would be Jay-Z – These two men have a certain aura about them. They both command respect, and may very well be one of the greatest to ever do what they do. Nobody really tries to throw at Revis, because they know what will happen, and nobody tries to start controversy with Jay-Z, for the very same reason. These two New Yorkers are very similar to each other and they both walk around with that “Empire State of Mind.”



    Terrell Suggs would be Kanye West – Both love to run their mouth, and they are pretty dang good at it. They talk like they are the best, but they simply are not. A few weeks ago, Suggs proclaimed that he graduated from “Ball So Hard University,” using a Kanye West song as inspiration for the statement. Suggs makes big plays, Kanye makes big hits. I wouldn’t want to step in the way of either of these guys, because it would probably end with some verbal and/or physical abuse. Both of these guys claim that they “got the power.”


    Chad Ochocinco would be Andre 3,000 – These two are similar in the fact that at one time, these guys were “drippin’ in swag,” as the young folk would say nowadays. But recently, things have gotten kind of weird, to say the least. Andre 3K hasn’t done much since his Outkast days, and Ochocinco fell off about 4 years ago. While the two are no longer relevant, they are still quite interesting. Chad has even been rumored to have remixed Andre’s classic hit “Ms. Jackson,” and substituted the title with “Mr. Belichick.” The hook goes something like this, “I’m sorry Mr. Belichick, I am foooo real!”


    Adam “PacMan” Jones would be DMX – Pacman would be DMX simply because both of these guys have been arrested on multiple occasions, yet they never seem to learn their lesson. They were both pretty solid in the prime of their careers, but there was never a time when they could focus solely on their careers without worrying about being incarcerated. There was a lot of potential wasted between these guys.



    Tony Romo would be Kid Cudi – Sometimes when one of these guys finish a song or game you think, “wow, that was awesome,” other times when they finish a song or game you think, “wait..was that serious?” You never know what you’re going to get with these two. Romo struggles with accuracy problems, Cudi struggles with drug problems. The two are quite similar, obviously. In one of Kid Cudi’s better songs he raps “I be high, then I be low…it’s the story of my life.” That about sums it up.



    Curtis Painter would be Lil B – To put it simply, both of these guys are utterly terrible at their profession and belong no where near the professional level.






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