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Boeing Reports from the FC Cincinnati MDW Game: Official Fan Motto is “We’ll Probably Come Back”

fc cincy

By: Nick Boeing

I attended Saturday’s futbol match between FC Cincinnati and the Harrisburg City Islanders (ridiculous ass team name). The festivities of the pre-game, game and post-game took a heavy toll on my ability to do anything for over 24 hours. You take shots of Fireball at 3 pm before a minor league soccer game and you know shit’s about to get weird.

drunk soccer guy

Soccer guys are lowkey the biggest drinkers

Since this was my first game in attendance with keeping the reputation of this blog in mind, I did my due diligence and stayed true to hard-working #journalists everywhere…other than the whole blacking out thing.

The game itself was great. Goalkeeper ‘Mafia Mitch’ Hildebrandt (best nickname ever, he’s the PUP List’s fav player now) was hardly threatened by any Islanders shots because of his enormous hands that are rumored to have once choked a gorilla into submission (RIP in peace Harambe). Andrew Wiedeman buried an absolute rocket from 25 yards out into the upper-90 of the far left post; a shot that certainly left me erect and ready for more. And, finally, Sean ‘Handsome Man’ Okoli secured a nice little penalty shot in the 89th minute. He seriously is pretty handsome. No shame.

Former Argentine soccer player Maradona gestures from a balcony as he attends the Argentine First Division soccer match between Boca Juniors and Quilmes in Buenos Aires

Mafia Mitch in 30 years

The crowd was somewhere in the ballpark of 16,000, which is pretty impressive considering it was Memorial Day weekend. And the most loyal fan section, The Bailey, is always a wild time if you’re into getting wild at a soccer game. So, I secured a spot to stand and did as any working journalist would and scoured the crowd for only the best of the best fans to try and gauge just how dedicated these people are. Ya know; is it a phase? Or are these mustachioed, craft beer-drinking people in it for the long haul?

Ignoring was aplenty and annoyance was abundant, but a journalist never rests.

Young, teenage-looking couple:
How long have you been FC fans?
“Uh, today.”
And what do you guys think so far?
“We like it.”
Anything else?
“We’ll probably come back.” (New fan base motto)
A while later:
So, what’d you guys think of the first half?
*10 seconds of ignoring me* “We liked it.”

I respected the blunt honesty here and the fact that the guy really didn’t wanna talk to me.

Girl who brought her three guy friends to their first ever pro soccer game:
How long have you been an FC fan?
“I discovered soccer last summer and decided it was something that I wanted to learn more about. I like sports in general; I go to Bengals games, Reds games.”
Are you from Cincinnati?
“Yeah. Why are you holding your phone up still?”
This quickly turned awkward and I turned back around and didn’t talk to her again.

People in FC gear at a bar after the game, clearly hammered. Also, I simply have the recordings of this that I don’t remember. Bear in mind that I’m practically shouting these questions:

What are your guys thoughts on FC Cincinnati?
“FC Cincinnati is amazing and awesome and amazing and awesome.”
“FC Cincinnati is a diehard (?) and is the best thing to ever happen to this city.”
Wait, wha-?
So you guys are huge FC fans?
“The biggest!”

You heard it here first. Games are worth going to for the great people like this. And, as is the motto, “I’ll probably go back.”

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