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BREAKING NEWS: Ohio State to Sell Beer at Football Games for First Time Ever

By: Alex Marcheschi

ESPN’s Darren Rovell just broke the biggest Ohio State football story since J.T. Barrett’s DUI. According to Rovell, Ohio State will serve beer at the football games for the first time ever during this upcoming season. This is a real story. Ohio State is dead seriously going to sell beer to kids during football games. 

This is clearly a POWER MOVE by Urban Meyer…take that Harbaugh. “Oh, you think you’ll get an edge by holding Michigan Football practices in the south, guess what, we are literally going to have the most savage cheering section of all time. Good luck getting a play call in.” – Urban to Harbaugh.

Seriously though, this is huge. Anyone who’s ever been to an OSU game knows that 70% of kids bring a flask in anyway. Making alcohol available to the students will make Ohio Stadium a damn madhouse. This is huge, make no mistake about. RIP In Peace Ohio Stadium. As one PUP Lister put it, “the expulsion rate will go up for sure.” Better lawyer up, OSU kids.

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p.s. Public Relations Hall of Fame move by OSU saying they’re selling beer to raise money to hire two new OSU police officers. Yeah right, they could hire a legitimate army of police with the money this will make.



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