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Ex-NFL Center Jason Brown Quit Football at 29, Watched a Few YouTube Videos, and Became a Farmer

By: JerryAnytime

Business InsiderIn 2009, Jason Brown signed a five-year, $37.5 million contract with the St. Louis Rams that made him the highest-paid center in the NFL.  Five years later, after earning more than $25 million of that contract, Brown is a farmer who is helping to feed the hungry. CBS News caught up with Brown in Louisburg, North Carolina, where he runs a 1,000-acre farm after learning how to grow crops on YouTube. 

Brown was drafted 124th overall in 2005 and played nine seasons in the NFL before getting cut by the Rams in the spring of 2012. At age 29, he still had plenty of NFL years ahead of him. He wasn’t playing at the level he was in 2009, but his career was far from over. He had interest from numerous teams, including an offer from the Baltimore Ravens.  But he walked away from the game. The NFL world was surprised, and ESPN ran a story with the headline, “The Curious Case Of Jason Brown.”

“My agent, he told me, ‘You’re making the biggest mistake of your life,'” Brown told CBS. “And I looked right back at him and I said, ‘No I am not.’”  Brown is doing this to help the less fortunate. He grows sweet potatoes and other vegetables and donates his harvest to food pantries.

So you’re telling me this guy knows how to truly run a 1,000-acre farm because he watched a YouTube video? I’ve watched 40 different YouTube videos on how to tie a tie and guess what folks, I can’t tie a fucking a tie. So either Jason Brown is a genius or we are once again confirming that I am not as bright as I’d like to be. Either way, I’m calling Jason Brown out big time for his methods. You can’t watch a few YouTube videos and be good at anything, let alone harvesting 46,000 pounds of cucumbers and sweet potatoes.

I do respect Brown making a quick 25 million, throwing up deuces, and bolting for North Carolina to harvest some crops though.  I want to genuinely hate on this story, but I just can’t. Jason Brown is following his calling to sow the earth to help other people, and that’s just a feel good story all around, man.

This story is refreshing after hearing about the numerous stories of ex-pro athletes who spent all their money on a lavish lifestyle or spend their millions paying child support and are now broke. While it’s definitely cooler to drive a Lamborghini and pop champagne every day at 9:30 AM, it makes more fiscal sense to just chill out and harvest some yams.

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P.S. If I had to play for the Rams, specifically playing at center with the hands of these freaks at the cusp of my butthole every Sunday, I’d probably move to rural NC and drive a tractor all day to.

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2 Comments »

  1. Jerry, Jerry-Baby!

    You’re prose “touches” so many of my senses.

    I tasted the yams and cucumbers. I smelled the fresh Carolina pine forest air. The visuals in your piece made my eyes yearn to be those of a farmer, my ears yearning in concert with my eyes.

    And yes, I puckered as I read “cusp of my anus”.

    Much Love & Two Fingers,

    Big PUPpy

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