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Hey Michigan Fans, Come Get Your Mans

By: Alex Marcheschi

They say “don’t meet your heroes,” well thanks to the miracle that is social media, Michigan fans have met theirs. Yet, somehow, instead of being concerned that their team is coached by a future serial killer, they praise him because he uses their best player decently at 18 different positions instead of amazingly at just one. In honor of “the game,” let’s run through the top 10 weirdest things that Jim Harbaugh has done since being at Michigan.

  1. Sleeping Over at Recruits’ Houses 

Only Harbaugh could sleep over at a high school boy’s house in a groutfit and not have the police called on him.

2. Eating boogers

In the least surprising thing ever, we found out that Harbaugh eats boogers this year. What’s done in the dark will be brought to the light. Those sneaky, sneaky cameras during nationally televised football games strike again!

3. Wearing a glove to the World Series 

A move reserved for small children and psychopaths. Harbaugh is the latter.

4. Drinking milk at a nice steakhouse 

Absolutely gross.

5. Randomly going shirtless 

Just a Grade A weird picture. Truly disturbing to look at. How does this make someone want to play for him? If I was a parent, not only would I not let my kid play for this guy, I’d file a restraining order.

6. Making a rap video entitled “Who’s Got It Better Than Us?” the year after Urban pimped a ring with his third string QB

Easy answer Jim, Ohio State does.

7. Going to Disneyland with Jerry Springer

Hanging with the second-most embarrassing former mayor of Cincinnati.

8. Trying to climb a tree for a recruit

Truly the Dwight Schrute of college coaches.

9. Being a “Devout Fan” of Judge Judy

What does Harbaugh have in common with inmates, old people forced into retirement homes, and divorced racist people? Loving Judge Judy.

10. Considering Spongebob to be a role model

In summation, Ohio State by 24!

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